My mix feeling at the moment...

I feel sad...

The Reality of Living in Malaysia

No doubt Malaysia, my home country, born and breed, I am a Malaysian, yes I am proud to be one. I have been in down under for the past 6 years, I have build my life there and I am happy to be a permanent resident, but I guess Australia will always remain as my second home, unless in the near future, I will settle down and have my family, I can call down under my first home. The times when I missed home, I wish was back, I get all the attentions from my family and friends, feeling rich with the amount of AUD I have due to the high exchange rate, sleep in, food is always ready on the table, no commitments and burdens, and most important, I have so many friends to hang out and talk too. Life is never boring here, but life here is hectic!

However, I can't see myself living in Malaysia at the moment, I mean if I ever return here to start my life, I might need time to get use to the environment. I have only been driving for the past few days, and realised I can die of heart attack driving, because the drivers here are crazy! There are three things I realised about them, firstly, they NEVER use their signals when turning right or left, I would suggest the Malaysian cars not to have a signal in the cars, because they never use it! Secondly, the cars have to follow closely behind your bumper, a way of letting you know, you are driving too slow, get out of my way! Excuse me! Since when driving according to the speed limit is a crime, oh yeah I forgot, there is never a speed limit in Malaysia! Lastly, the drivers here use the honk more than their signals, so when you hear a horn, you have to look twice and see whether some idiots are trying to get pass you!

Another important issue concerned, will be the cost of living, everything are expensive, from food to clothing, cosmetics, shoes, toiletries, but the weird thing is, the salary package has barely increased over the past few years! How do people survive here? The starting pay is low, and everyone has to work their way up to at least reach RM3000 ( $1000), with 2 years experience, having to pay for car installments ( the prices of the car are very expensive!), shopping for work clothes, a shirt would average cost at least RM70 and above, shoes, cosmetics, and knowing my spending habits, I can never have enough to spend here. I just don't understand how they survive! The only reason I understand why I can buy things here without thinking twice, is because I am earning AUD, and with the strong exchange rate now, I feel is worth the value to buy, but if I was working here, I might not even consider buying anything.

One final concern would be the security, everywhere I go, everyone tell me, make sure you have your handbag close to you at all times, for example, when we are at a restaurant, we have to put our bags on our laps, to ensure the bag is safe, because putting it on the table or a chair next to us, would encourage people to steal from us. I can't eat or drink properly with the bag on my lap, it's so inconvenient but if I don't do so, I can have the risk of losing my bag! I am not encourage to wear any gold jewellery or items that might attract people to look, and when they look, I feel so uncomfortable. It's not safe to drive alone, to go out till late, or even to walk on the streets, because anything can happen at anytime. I feel safe when I am back in Australia, walking on the streets during wee hours were never a problem, having open bags without a zipper was never a security issue, this is the reason we are taxed so high because the government provides us with securities to ensure we are safe. The polices here are corrupted, they don't care about our securities and probably under paid to do their job!

The thing I miss here is the night life, there are so many cafes, pubs and clubs opened at the moment, anytime of the day, there are lots of people around and it makes me feel that I have a life. It feels good to catch up with old high school friends, getting to know how their life is going, what it would feel like if I was to settle down here for good. One thing I am sure, I can never leave work early, and might have to stay up late depending on the job I have, because everyone here have their dinner after 9 pm, it's sad, but they are used to it.

Sometimes, I feel I am in the middle of a crossroad, I don't know which path to take, and when I am at different places I feel different. Everyone wish they were in Australia and some are trying so hard to apply for permanent residency or working visa to live and work there. As for me, I am fortunate to have my permanent residency visa, and allows me to work and live there, to fly back and from Malaysia. I guess the grass is always greener on the other side, not until you have experience both world, then you will know what to choose. I miss Australia at the moment, I miss the relaxed life, the weather, I definitely don't miss the work! Work is something I am not looking forward to at the moment, it's hard when you have a holiday abroad, when everyday is a Sunday, but it's time I face reality. Stress, stress and more stress!

One week till I am leaving, part of me want to stay and leave at the same time. Is this normal?

Yen

When 2 become 1

It has been a week already since I touch down, and time do fly quickly when you are having a great time! I have too many pictures to post, but I will select some good ones to post. I attended my good friend's wedding last weekend, as a bride's maid, I had so much to prepare and do before and during the ceremony. I stayed at her place on a Friday night, having to wake up at 6 am the very next day, prepared difficult questions for the bridegroom, and to make sure we get the right amount of ''angpao'' from them :) After the tea ceremony, we travelled 3.5 hours to Kluang, another state situated at the South of Peninsula Malaysia. I have not been travelling interstate for a very long time, but I have to say, it does feel different in smaller towns, but it was a good catch up with everyone. It's weird how everyone knows everyone, and it's a small world, that people we knew by the name but whom we never thought we had a chance to meet, and this occasion had bring a lot of nice people together. I guess when u least expect, good things happen. I can say I enjoyed myself!

I am lack of sleep for these few days, and I am glad I can now get connected to the Internet, have my space to relax and no time commitments or sms and calls coming in every hour. I have another wedding dinner to attend this coming Saturday, and I am looking forward to meet my ex uni mates, have some drinks and be loud!

Please feel free to visit my flickr website for the wedding pictures! http://www.flickr.com/photos/10155261@N08/?saved=1

Cheers
Yen

Touch down

I have safely touch down, having a little jet lagged, and my flight experience was terrible. First to start off, my pre departure didn't go to well, had problem uploading songs into my Ipod, and did not go to yum cha at red emperor because time was running out! I arrived at the airport, and there was a long line for check in, apparently the flight was full! I got my sit next to an Aussie woman in her mid 40's, did not speak a single word, how rude.

We had a bad weather conditions yesterday during the flight, there were a few times we experienced some turbulence, and I hate it when this happen. I start to visualise all the bad sights of travelling on the air plane. anything can happen, for example, like a crash! My hands were sweaty, and my head was spinning, my heart was falling out, it's such a bad experience. Now, I still feel the turbulence feeling while I am typing this out. We touch downed on time, but the baggage collection was delayed due to technical problems, I had to wait for nearly more than half an hour to get my luggage. When I did, one of the locks on my bag were missing, I had a bad feeling someone might open my bag and steal my things, my heart was racing, and I quickly open it, and realised everything are still in place! Phew!

I guess the most important part, I get to see my family waiting for me with a big smile and hug, they had waited for nearly an hour, but everything is good :) Dad is getting a little old, he looks thin and he said is due to stress. Mum is nagging me as usual, about my hair, my food, you know the mum's routine speech! I still need sometime to get used to the environment, the weather is humid, but it's not as hot as I expected.

It's weird, but I miss Australia, I guess everyone goes through the mix feeling of being at 2 different places.

Cheers
Yen

Leaving in 3 hours

I am leaving for Malaysia in 3 hours time. I can't find my novels, which I intended to bring aboard the plane to read during my 8 hours flight back. Unfortunately, I can't find it in any of the boxes, there are all sealed and it's annoying! I have not updated my Ipod songs, the apple function is so not user friendly, now I can't decide whether I should go for a Ipod Nano Video. I am excited to be going back and having a holiday. I have finish packing EVERYTHING, except having to carry people's item, which will be putting more weight on to my bag, and for once I wish I can travel light. I am never going to tell everyone I am going back to Malaysia for holidays, when all these favours start coming up, and it's so hard not to say NO!

Important items I need to bring with me during my holidays:

• Camera, snap snap!
• Sun block ( strong sun everywhere)
• Shorts ( for comfort)
• Sunnies ( to protect my eyes)
• GUCCI Gold card (HAHAHHAHAH)
• Hair straightener ( I need it! )
• Most important- Arriving safely to see my family

Have a good time working everyone! I will update my trip with pictures and of course stay tune for the wedding pictures. Check my facebook out too!

Bon Voyage Australia

Yen

Last Day in Docklands

My days are up in Docklands, the next trip back from Malaysia, I will be in a new apartment, with different surroundings, on Collins Street. Although it's only 10 minutes walk from Docklands, living by the harbour and in the city is totally a different feeling and environment. If I have a choice I will want to live in Docklands, a quiet environment, great views facing the harbour, and the outdoor stunning swimming pool, I will surely miss this home. However, if I had to choose between Docklands or a home with my privacy and freedom, I am sure I will choose freedom. It's so good sharing with my sister, having to live with people close to you, and most importantly, having the freedom to do anything I want. Yes, I will choose freedom.

These 2 weeks had been really hectic with so much packing to do, but I had it all planned out, everyday I packed a little to ensure that everything falls into place before I leave this Saturday back to Malaysia for my holidays. I have not felt the excitement yet, I reckon it's because I am so exhausted from packing and worrying at the same time, I don't feel I am on my holidays yet. I had all my furniture shopping done at Ikea on Melbourne's Cup Day, a quiet day with no traffic on the streets and not having to queue, I am glad I managed to get everything done.

I think I might have to stop buying things, just anything! It's hard when it comes to packing personal belongings, so much to throw out, and it's such a waste but at the sane time I can't store so much at my new apartment. I had 3 bags of old clothing, bags and shoes to donate, gosh! It's hard to buy what you need and not what you want! I am still learning :)

2 days till I am leaving.

Yen feels tired
Yen feels too much to do yet so little time
Yen has not feel the excitement yet
Yen does not want to go to work already
Yen is looking forward to see her family
Yen first meal in Malaysia will be Nasi Lemak..yummmmmm

Yen wants to sleep, good night everyone!

A little respect

I wish you would give me a little respect on how I feel, think about my feelings and reasons before deciding on something. I wish you would stop pretending and acting like you would sacrifice for me, but then taking a risk to see whether I would give in. I hate you! It's all about you and your events and friends, different lifestyle, something different bullshit! Stop chasing the superficial sight of life and neglect how I feel. You get to every event you want to, I have never not say No to where you want to go, and for once today, I wish you could cancel your plans and accompany me and my friends for my event. Is it so hard to do so?

What is so big deal about Simon's house or comforting Jenny, and what is the point of saying you did include me but when I am not even close to anyone there, and telling me is part of our plan. It has always been you, you and you. You wanted to go, you wanted to be part of yourself, and I am so called in your picture is when you casually include me in your plans. Have you ever asked whether I wanted to go? Would I be comfortable going and do I have any plans? After so many arguments and bullshit, you still act and pretend to take your mobile to say ''oh yeah, I will cancel the plans to make you happy'', but you did not! It's all an act.

Is it so wrong for me to ask you to accompany on my day off, to do something with my friends that you said we boring, just before I leave for Malaysia? Am I asking for too much? At the end of the day, it's not about the respect anymore, you go further by pointing out all my flaws and then tell me how sometimes you cancel your plans for me without telling me. So what??!?!?! You could have let me know and not make it sound like I am the bitch now. It's all about you. All about your cool friends and events. All about you being famous. All about YOURSELF!

Yeah we have different lifestyles. I am the boring one staying at home doing nothing. You happy now I am at home while you are at your cool friends' place. I am feeling upset and disappointed because I can't have any respect from you as a partner. You ask your partner questions, and think about their feelings before doing it your way. If you think I am such a burden, I am fucking not coming back to Aus, and should just live my life in Malaysia. How is that? fuck the moving out plans!

Long overdue

I know it has been a long time since I blogged about my life, well overdue for 2 weeks, it's not that long, but I guess for people who comes by my blog, does complain. These 2 weeks had past me by in a blink of eye, so much has happened yet I can't seem to know where to start. Let's start with work, something boring but yet interesting, and then we shall move on to my future life expectations, and also a little bit of emo adding into it.

Firstly, work has been more stress free for the past 2 weeks, my assistant manager is back from her vacation, and with her guiding and assisting me, had help a lot in reducing my mental stress, recently, I have been sleeping like a baby, eating like a pig, and less pimples on my face everyday :) I realised the reasons pimple outbreaks happened so often, is because of the stress and unhappiness coming from my work. However, I have moved on from being unhappy over work, by expressing myself more to my manager, my love ones, and also sometimes through my blog. When you move from being a normal staff to a management level, everything changes, staff that you thought were your friends might no longer be the same, and often a distant need to be kept, it's sad, but it's the reality of life. If they are not mature to think like you, then it's not worth worrying and trying so hard to make a difference. Lesson to be learnt!

I have decided to move out from Docklands, we have managed to find a good 2 bedroom apartment on Collins Street, much closer to work, having to wake up 30 minutes later is awesome! There are many preparations to be done, I am going to have the next 3 months occupied with my new apartment, furniture shopping, work hours extended due to Xmas, and most importantly, my Malaysia trip :) I have less than a month to appreciate my stay in Docklands, I will surely miss the jacuzzi and swimming pool, which I hardly make use of it, and soon I am no longer entitled to it. I have so much to do yet so little time, I need to start packing my personal belongings, apartment inspection and furniture shopping before I leave for Malaysia. We are officially moving out on the 1st Dec to our new place, and I will only be back on the 2ND Dec, which means, my honey bunny will be doing all the hard work! Muaks :) Thanks for doing this! This what I am looking forward to, an apartment by ourselves, and not having to worry about sharing with weird housemate.

I fell sick for the last few days, caught a cold and was really exhausted, but I have been catching up with my sleep, had plenty of water, and now I am feeling much better. Unfortunately, with all these sickness, I am feeling emo and vulnerable, not wanting to go to work, and the shocking point is, I don't even feel like going out, I just want to stay under my blankets and sleep. Has anyone feel like this before?

Finally, I will update about Jacky Cheung concert on my next post, with some pictures and videos that might take some time to upload. I am missing the concert, he is awesome in singing, no sings as good as him :)

Till then, ciao!

Yen

Never a win win situation

It's right that is never easy to manage a team, with different people from different backgrounds, and most importantly, choosing the right way to communicate with the team. Sometimes, I need to be who I am in the store, to manage and guide the team, and yes, there will be times I might have to tell workmates off. Everything I do, are with good intentions, but then, from their point of view, I am classified as the bad person.

I can't satisfy everyone, the way they want to be treated, because I do need to think of myself, my positions and the reason I am doing it. However, I am an emotional person, no matter how hard I try to take emotions away from my decision making, I can't. I know one thing I learn from this situation is that we can never be too close to one person at work, because it will be hard to make decisions and at the end of the day someone might get hurt.

Today, I realised I have never felt this in such a long time, the feeling of not wanting to go to work, the feeling of wanting to let go everything, and just collapse. I called in sick because I did not want to face anyone from work, did not want to pretend, and be jolly, and bury my head with paper works, I just wanted to rest and be myself today. Things will not be that hard, if I could lean on someone to help, to listen, or to let me know that things are going to be alright, and at this point in time, I need my managers to guide me, but then I am left alone.

I guess I have done my best at this point, and I can never be perfect to satisfy everyone, I can't cry at work, because this will prove I am not capable, the only time I can be myself is when I am at home, I let it all out.

Mamacas, Chapel Street

We meet good people as we grow, and there are times we need to part, it's sad, but it's life. I guess I always complain about how bad work is, but I never once did express myself, how happy am I to meet nice and good friends at my work place. It's funny because I see them at work everyday, and when we are working, we are serious, but when we come out together as friends, we have fun, and everything seems different from that perspective.

Zoe, whom I have know for more than a year from work, she is leaving to join Jet Star and no longer with Gucci. We had a farewell dinner yesterday at Mamacas, on Chapel Street, serving great Greek cuisine, it's more of a fine dining but at the same time it's a casual environment. We had wine, saganaki, chicken skewers, meatballs and lamb and what matters most to me, was the company I had. Yesterday night, I felt the stress from work had all disappeared, we did not talk about work, but we had some good conversations about life and food! I will miss Zoe, and I wish her the best of luck in her future with Jet Star, these pictures of us will all remain memorable.

At work, there are always people bitching about each other, we never can have time to sit down and get to know one another, but yesterday was something different. We were ourselves, behaving as good friends, with Zoe leaving us, I realised I should cherish everyone of them because you never know who might leave one day. Here are some pictures I would like to share, there are my colleagues at work and my friends whom I met while working in Gucci. Mind the wine effects, cheeky and red faces :)

Farewell Hug for Zoe

Daphne, Zoe's sister!

A close up of us! Red cheeks!

Cheers!

Rosemary, photo taking fanatic girl :P

Elvira and Takako
















From left: Me, Zoe, Ayako, Ting, and Rosemary

Yen and Tiara

Cheers

Yen

Exhausted and Wrecked

I feel tired, almost everyday, it feels like I can never have enough rest, mentally exhausted and I am going to collapse anytime soon. I hate this job! I have so much to worry, so much burden on my shoulders, I can't rest, and I have no room to breathe. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


Can someone help me?

Forever love?

I am really down today. I have come to realise that, these 3 years 7 months is nothing but rubbish. I feel that, there are no trust in us, most importantly, I can't feel it from you. Every weekend, there are something to argue about, from the smallest issue to some of the worst ones. However, whenever I sit down by myself and think, I realised that it has become a norm, and I am starting to feel a little insecure about us as a whole picture. The cries, the feeling of being so unhappy had happen so frequent, and at some stage, I don't know if it's my fault or yours, but I guess it doesn't matter because whenever we see each other, we have something against each other.

Today, I felt disappointment, most of all I don't feel the love, but all I see is you trying to prove yourself right, to the point where you have neglected my feelings, over a small issue. I feel the pressure of using your properties, I feel that these material, no life things are far much more important than me, as a human, alive and needing the special care and attention. I swear if I did have the monetary power, I will never need someone like you, to support and help me, but in return I felt that I have owed you in so many ways. You don't make me feel like you are willing to help me because you love me, but as an obligation, am I right? Today, I feel powerless, threatened, and most of all, I don't feel the love from you, or maybe I have learn to love less?

Every weekend, you have never failed to make me upset, never failed to make me realised that I am beginning to feel insecure, I am really exhausted from all these arguments. Today, I told myself I will be good, just enjoy the great afternoon, and yes, I was looking forward to it, but it doesn't matter, because at the end of the day, you have never failed to prove to me you do not have the intention to have a great day. If we want to continue this journey, there are so much effort to put in it, it's not about playing with your life, and having me to take the risk, whether this is worth the journey, I am tired. I am just human.

Tears are running down my face as I am typing all these, these are true words from my heart. I feel like giving up.


Yen

A week full of adventure

It's been a week since I last updated, I think this blog has been abandoned for a while, life is pretty much the same, working full time and paying of bills. This week has been full of surprises, ups and downs, and most importantly, having to cope with the stress. I have to say I am lousy when it comes to being an optimistic person or I am not too good in coping with stress, especially at work. This week I have been trying to run a business and I can tell you, it's not easy being a manager, having to deal with different problems and at the same time having to make sure the staff is working their ass off. Mind the language. I have to say I have been coping really well, given the fact that I have so little time to learn everything from admin, to doing the roster, to stock transfer, handling customer complains, and the hardest part is having to use my most professional way to reason with the staff. Some call in sick and not coming to work on time, I am so over it!

On a lighter note, I am learning new things everyday, having new experience and yes, it does contribute to my resume and I hope this will bring me somewhere. I am learning to build new customer relationship, building the trust and delivering my service, maybe one fine day, I can have my own business :) Working in Gucci is not easy as it seems, there are lots to learn, everyday I come across different problems, and when I am stress, pimples start popping out everywhere on my face. The easiest job might be the hardest, do not judge the book by it's cover. At the end of the day, we work to support ourselves, to survive and learn to be a better person.

I am looking forward to my holidays in November, the time to relax and cherish every single minute with my love ones back home. The best time, when work is off your mind, is when you are having the best time of your life, drinking, eating, shopping and just having the time to waste and to catch up on sleep.

I am definitely waiting for this moment :)

2 months till I am back......

Yen

Happy Birthday Mum & Happy Merdeka Day!

Happy birthday mum! Today, every year I think of you and wish I was there to celebrate your birthday, unfortunately, I have been unable to for the last few years, but I never fail to wish you. It's Chui San first year not able to celebrate this special event with you, but one thing for sure we think of your unconditional love for us through out the years, and today it's the day you were brought to the world by god, and without you, we won't be here. I hope today will be the best day, enjoy every minute and make the best out of it. We miss you!

Happy Merdeka Day to everyone back in Malaysia. 50 years if independence, proud of it :)

Yen

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEI SAN!

Happy Birthday my dear friend! I guess I never fail to wish you every year and, thanks for being there for me when I needed you the most. I am looking forward to spend time with you when I get back in Nov :) I hope today, will be the day you feel special, pampered and treasured by your love ones! Also, have a blast at Jacky Cheung concert :)

Spring is here!

SPRING IS FINALLY HERE!

The whole week is sunny! How good can this get? Love it.............

Colours, sandals, skirts, light jackets, dresses...

Flowers....

Sunny...

-------@

Yen wants......

I felt like I have work 2 weeks in a row non stop, feeling exhausted, mentally and physically. My feet are sore, my legs are numb, my hair is in a mess, and I feel I don't have a life. Everyday, I am looking forward to 10Th Nov, the day I am flying back to Malaysia for my best friend's wedding, have a break from Gucci, eat, shop, have a get-together-session with my good friends, travelling with my family and most importantly, to rest my feet! I don't get a chance to apply for annual leave end of the year, where everyone gets to travel for Xmas and Chinese New Year, while I am stuck at work, and working my ass off during the festive season. This year is different, is something I had planned since last year, and Gucci being so kind to approve my leave, so let's say I am going to make the best out of it. I just got back from Malaysia end of Feb this year and now I am going back for the second time in Nov :)

I have booked my air ticket, cost me $1080, but then Lin Min is sponsoring half of it, lucky me! I have to start hunting for a bride's maid dress, get my hair trim, dye and perm, shop for a pair of evening sandal, and a clutch. I have so much to do yet so little time and money! I am waiting for my tax return and also I have managed to earn $200 on Sunday at work for fraud credit card. Woooooo! All these go to my credit card debts!

I need to:

• Perm my hair, mid Sept, I need my hair to grow longer for a nice effect.
• Pay my air ticket by end of this week with cash! Bloody credit card charges a 2% interest DONE
• Pedicure, ugly toes and nails! DONE
• Hunt for dresses
• Celebrate Christine's Birthday in Sept
• Tulip farm in Oct

Cheers

Yen :)

Incompetent customer service

What has happen to the world of customer service, where have all the courtesy and politeness go, and why do we get shit attitudes and yet, why do we still buy their brands? The retail industry is so simple yet so difficult to work in, having the most minimum wage, having t0 work the weekends, public holidays and no annual leaves during Xmas period. Is this a job that does not need the brains, but just the looks, the blonds and the pretenders. Yes, I am talking about sale persons, working in stores, who thinks they know everything about customer service. I am a sales person too, but I am a person, who knows how to give the best customer service, coming from Gucci, they expect nothing but the best. Why is it so hard to get some decent service around, when myself can provide a good one, but yet some of them out there, are just acting like a BITCH.

I am sure you all can guess I had experienced a bad customer service experience that was full of accusations, embarrassments and so called for being rude, when the sales person was being rude, she forgot to look at herself in the mirror the way she talked. A brand so well known in Australia, but yet have such low quality sales person to provide good customer service, and yet they think all customers come in just for the designs, they are so wrong. I think I have already told 10 people about this incident, words of mouth is such a strong media to spread the news and gossips, and yes I am talking about Bettina Liano. She shops in Gucci with her sister, expecting the best service from us, but yet her staff in Little Collins St Store can't do a good job in providing superior customer service.

Basically, I was really upset, but I have learn to complain as a customer in the most appropriate way, through email and normal postage, and I want them to know that, to survive in the retail industry, you need to have good service towards your customers, although they might buy the cheapest thing in the store, they are still a customer that has the power to be right at all times.

Recently, I have been experiencing bad services, from my agents, and as well, the body corporate. I am dissapointed with the Aussies, they think they have the brains, but they are the laziest person in their country. I will not let the Aussies look down on the Asians. I will stand up for myself.

The good old times

The cheeky Me, Albert and Ah Peng, back in 2004 CNY.

Elaine Choong, her favourite Japanese place, Hanabishi, she left for Malaysia in July, 2006

Yen and Novel, he left for Indonesia in January, 2006

Good friends remain

Albert, my good old buddy, left for Hong Kong Nov, 2006

Yen and Jacquie, we got closer since last year, she left for Hong Kong March, 2007

St Leonard's trip last Nov, the last trip we had together for Albert's farewell

Albert and April, may you both be strong

Summer 2006, sadly the group is no longer attached

From left: Jacquie, Yen, April and Michelle


Phillip and Albert, both in Hong Kong now, having the time of their life, miss you guys!

There are a few songs in my play list that reminds me of the past, actually, good old times, friends whom you
meet along the way, most of us parted, we all lead different lives now, and sometimes I wonder what are they doing now. Are they happy? Do they still remember the times we shared, the laughter we created, the bond we tied? It's easier to lose someone close as compared to creating that friendship, it takes time to create the bond, but it can take seconds to lose contact, or is it because no one is willing to put effort in.

I admit sometimes I do tend to sway away, and forgets that one person still exist, and when I realised that we once shared a bond, I feel upset that the older we get, our circle of friends are smaller. The songs and pictures refresh my memories, I have flash backs of good times, times when I had so many friends to hang out with, times when you look forward to see your friends when you go to Uni, times when you don't have so much burden and commitments.

I am not saying that my life now is not as good as before, I guess we all go through a different phase in life, we work 5 days a week total up to 38 hours, spending half of our life earning money to support ourselves. We have partners now to look after, hoping for a future, and we probably having the same routine everyday, it's not sad, but it's life. I am choosy with friends, I tend to pick ones that I can get along with, or have something in common, but somehow those close ones tend to grow apart, and it takes two to maintain the bond.

I miss them.

I miss each and everyone of you. I hope one day we all can catch up like old times, but deep down, I know
things will always be different.

GARDASIL

Today my actual day off, technically I had 2 days off in a row, my manager rang me yesterday telling me I did not need to come in for work, since I am starting at 1.30 pm, and I can take the rest of the day off Weeeeeeeeee...It's a bonus for me :) It felt like winning the tatts!

Anyway, I went out for lunch with Evelyn and ended up buying a pair of Bettina Liano jeans, and realised that I have overspent on my credit card this month. I had two of my closest friends' birthday, shouted dinner and bought pressies, including shopping spree on myself, had make me in debt! I am not going to get pay till mid next Wednesday, and worst of all, my Optus land line bill just came and having to subsidise $100, some stupid new rules about paying the 3 months rental fee in advance..bah! I promise I will spend less next month, actually I need to budget, I feel so not myself. I have rent, bills, Medibank, life insurance, grocery expenses, life is getting tougher each day.

Today, I took my Gardasil Vaccine from the GP, a type of vaccine to prevent cervical cancer, and it's a three course to be completed within 6 months. The government now is providing it free from women aged from 18-26 till mid of next year. I am consider really lucky, but then it's part of paying my medicare levy every year through my tax, so might as well make use of the benefits. My left arm now feels a little numb, and having stomach cramps due to my menstrual. I think it's pretty much a rest day for me today :)

Alright, the computer is making some weird sound for now, I better restart the computer now. Till then, will update soon.

Yen

My next buy!

My next month, I want this!

When work gets tough, I turn to....

When work gets tough, I turn to....

• My baby, he is always there for me ( most of the times), supporting me, listening to my whinge and be my punching bag :)


• My home sweet home, my comfortable bed, my computer, my 500 play list songs.


• My Chinese TVB series, that will keep me entertained, and not think of work at all!


• My blog, where I can blog and complain how unhappy I am, and no one will tell you to shut up.


• My GUCCI shoes! I try them on when I am unhappy to let myself know all my hard work and stress is worth it.

The reason why work has been a bitch for these 2 weeks, because of sale pack up and new staff training happening at the same time. A new staff joined Gucci last week, her name is Melissa, I have been training her from scratch and now I am sick, my cough is still going on for nearly a week. It's tiring to train new people, especially when it needs so much energy and enthusiasm within yourself, and having that one person to understand is not easy. I have always like training, and now given the chance, I feel like saying, I am not doing it at anymore. It's harder than it seems :(

Sometimes, in my work place, I feel Asians are always picked on, are pushed around, and the Aussies get away and are always given the leniency. Why is this so? Am I sensitive? This what I have been feeling for the past 2 weeks. When I first started in Gucci, I had to listen to what others say, never say NO or I DON'T KNOW, I was not given a choice to do what I wanted to, and I never whinge. However, Melissa gets good treatments, she is given a choice to do what she wants, is it because she is tiny and fragile, of she is from a wealthy family or because the Aussies are always the favourable? Today, I have tried to talk to her, and not to discriminate her with my thoughts, she is friendly but at the same time, she is smarter than all of us think, but one thing I know for sure, she is lazy. Enough of work, the stories can never end!

Recently, I have find the government pretty useless in Australia, I honestly don't like this country in terms of all its policies, I don't feel I am protected in all ways. The Workplace Relation Agreement tells us we can stand up for ourselves , and have the rights to tell the employer off if the rules are not followed, IE: lunch breaks, pay salary, hours of work, etc. I had the notice stuck on my locker, but at the same time what can I do tell Gucci we should be given at least 45 minutes break? It says we can't be sacked if the employer breaks the rules, and we can file for a complaint. Is it worth doing it and lose my job? It doesn't make sense, when the government encourages us to do it, but yet I don't see any protection and given in a way. My sister works in Subway at the moment, and she is being exploited, and worst of all she doesn't know her rights, she does not get paid for the extra hour they made her stay back, giving excuses she has to finish her tasks, BULLSHIT! She does not have a payslip for the hours she works, she is underpay for her age, and this is has really make me mad, and the only thing we can do is file a complain, but only when she quits! What does it matter then? If she was to stand up for herself, and file a complain, she will lose her job, but yet the government said, she can't be sack! At the end, who is going to protect her? I find this contradicting, and I hate these people taking advantage because we are overseas residents, or because we are Asians!

Last Saturday, Billy's cousins sister's friend was sexually harassed at a bus stop, while waiting for the bus. An Aussie man came out of no where, pretend he was checking the timetable, and then slap her buttock, and left running away. What an idiot and pervert he is! She was shocked and upset, and yet didn't know what to do, and she was afraid to report to the police, afraid her parents might find out. This is so ridiculous! Discrimination and sexual harassment, advertised everywhere, government supporting us in a way, but at the end of the day, I don't see how is this happening. I am so disappointed with this country. I thought it will be a safe one as compared to my home country, but I guess everywhere is the same, is the people that have problems.

Tomorrow my day off, I need a good rest. I would like to share my Gucci collection shoes, one of the things I turn to, when I feel stress with work, or unhappy with life, I cherished them like my babies :)

My new patent wedges, so sexy!

The side look of it

Summer sandals, bought it at a bargain!

My first pair of Gucci canvas shoes!

Love the bamboo heel :)

Guccissima white moccassins

Only $50!

I am off to dreamland for now, till then ciao!

Home sick :(

I miss home at this moment, right now, right here, and I so wish I had my family beside me by my side. Where is that one person when you need them by your side, to care and love you? Why is a call so hard to do? I feel so sick now, feels worst when I am stuck in the room, having nothing to do, and worst fo all, some people giving lame excuses about not calling. You have 24 hours a day to at least make a 5 mins call to ask how am I, but you took 15 minutes to explain all reasons why you can't call and ask how am I? I find this pathetic and ironic. You have been slacking in this relationship, and I can see it but yet I don't understand why don't you see it for yourself. I know in a relationship, is not all about minding who does what, but at the end of the day, I am a girl with emotions, and yes I am sick and is emotional, so why is it so hard just for you to care more than usual.

Every weekend, I try to get my days off just to spend the extra time with you, but yet everytime you made me feel that you are too busy for me and having to put me second. We had this talk before, and yet you cant get the point I am going through.

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CALL?

I am sick!

I am coughing, I don't feel good. I don't want to go to work. I want to call in sick!

:(

Birthday weekend!

Last weekend was the best weekend I ever had,we ate, drank ,sang and most importantly, hanging out with the right crowd :) On Friday night, we had Karaoke at the Glen, I honestly don't sing, but then with the right crowd and some alcohol, I was singing, or shouting, or let's say screaming, but I enjoyed myself. The night out was to celebrate Marcus's and Billy's 26 Th birthday, with a huge cake, but unfortunately we could not not finish it. One late night down, one more to go. The very next day, we had dinner at Sarti, an Italian Restaurant, the food is great, but the servings were too small, but then again, is fine dining. After dinner, we had dessert at Max Brenner in QV, and then headed back to Billy's place for some wine and a Monopoly game. I suck at this game, Chris and I went bankrupt at the first round, we had to mortgaged or sell our properties! We played till 3 am, and realised that we need to get to bed, another late night has drained all of us mentally. The signs of getting old :) On a Sunday, I decided to just sleep in, relaxed and watched some movies, and be prepared to get back to work on a Monday, I had the worst time because I so wanted to continue my weekends.

I miss the weekend, now I am back with no weekends except for some Saturdays, which I really treasure so much, but yet having one person to understand is so hard. Why don't they ever try to understand or think of our feelings and situations before doing something. Maybe if you could ask or let me know in advance, things wont turned so ugly, and I will not be upset. It's all about respect and communicating. You think for your partner first before thinking for yourself. This is how life goes when you are committed to a person. I am just a human with emotions, and not one of your events of lifeless things, when somehow you can be so committed to the things.

Anyway here are some pictures of my last weekend :)

My baby and I 17/07/07

Drink with style















My present to him :)















Sang K, The Glen, everyone is jolly from the alcohol















The Huge Dark and White Chocolate..Yummy















Bobby, Myself, and Christine, we were so drunk!















Dinner at Sarti















This picture is so much more presentable as compared to the drunk pics, the before and after effect :P


Love
Yen

Rain rain go away.....

Melbourne has been cold and wet for the past 2 weeks, it's a good thing, we are short of water and now the water storage has increase. I guess I am not a winter person, I dislike the cold weather, wet surroundings, and most of all it makes you feel moody. Work this week is a ''bitch'', I am really stress, too many things to do yet so little time. I forgot important dates, I don't recall receiving sms, and one morning, I wore my sister jeans instead, wondering why did I put on so much weight! Anyways, I am sorry if I have not been replying every one's call and sms, I was over exhausted and mentally tired.

I have requested to take next Friday, Saturday and Sun day off, it's a long weekend for me, claimed my time in lieu, I need some good rest, a break from Gucci. It feels so good to have the weekends off, I have decided to request for almost every weekend off, or at least a Saturday off. It's good for myself, besides I feel can do more with my friends, not having to worry to work the very next day.

Today, I had a facial, I had to clear all my pimples on my face, hidden ones, and now it's so red and ugly. I will need to wait at least for a week, before it's all clear and clean, the reason why I am staying home tonight. I feel good now, my face feels extremely clean and fresh, no make up, just red spots and scars at the moment. I reckon ever since I took up my new roles as a supervisor, I have lack of sleep and water, mentally and physically tired, and stress, as a result, I am having bad pimples break out. Also, having to put make up everyday, the fact I am working on the front line, being presentable and professional, has contributed to the break out. I will remain positive and hoping it will be much better later. Or maybe I am going through hormonal changes, it's common for females at this age, it proves I am still young :P

I hope next week will be a better week for me, staying positive and happy, sometimes it's hard, but I guess at the end of the day, this is the only way to keep you going. At this age, everything you do seems like a burden, can't be as care free as before, everyday there are different problems, and yet, we still have to get through it.